Sarah Nigbor

Now that all my kids are in middle and high school, I feel like I need to learn a new version of the English language. Good thing I’m a grammar geek. I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts in French and Spanish; I can handle a little teen English, right?

Toward the end of fifth grade, it’s like my daughter hit a switch. She went from a sweet, shy, proper young lady to a sassy, spunky, LOUD child with a whole new vocabulary. When she and her two friends had a sleepover, I couldn’t understand what they were talking about. I knew they were speaking English, but none of it made sense. I heard the word “slay” about 100 times, along with “cap,” “Karen,” “Felicia Bob,” “rat,” “bruh,” “roach,” “musty,” “crusty,” and “dusty.” Here is an example of tween speak in a sentence. “Bruh, my teacher is such a Karen and she’s so musty. That’s no cap.” This can be translated as, “My teacher is such a jerk and she stinks. That’s no lie.”

Here is a dictionary of tween/teen slang often used in texting and regular conversation:

Bruh: A word you say when someone says something stupid; a greeting

Cap: Lying for no reason

Crusty: Anyone or anything that is ugly, raggedy or cheap

Dusty: Ugly or unclean

Felicia: A great, but abnormal person

Fire: Hot, trendy, amazing

Gucci: Good, cool

Karen: A rude, vile, entitled woman (I’m sorry to all the kind Karens out there)

Lit: Amazing, cool

Musty: Someone who appears unclean, disheveled, or has a bad odor.

Roach: Dirty, wannabe thug

Salty: Angry, bitter, agitated

Sick: Cool, awesome

Slay: To do something particularly well. “Cool.”

Tea: Gossip or situation

Thick: A girl who isn’t fat or skinny, but well-proportioned.

Thirst trap: A photo or flirty message posted on social media for the intent of causing others to publicly profess their attraction, needed to feed the poster’s ego or need for attention.

I grew up in the 90s, so I’m sure I used my share of slang popular then, but I don’t remember it. I do remember thinking my mom and grandparents had a lot of weird, old-fashioned words for things that would make me giggle when they’d say them.

Davenport: Couch or sofa

Drawers: Underwear

Floozy: Promiscuous woman

Fuzz: Police (sidenote: One time when I was little, I allegedly said to an officer “Look, it’s the fuzz!” at Country Kitchen)

Heifer: A woman people don’t approve of

Horn: The phone

Knucklehead: An idiot, someone acting like a fool

Living the life of Riley: Having an easy time through life

Spiffy: Cool, awesome

When I was little, I spent a lot of time with my grandpa and wanted to be just like him. When he came in from doing chores, he’d wash his hands and fastidiously comb his hair. I would often do the routine with him. I’d lather my hands up carefully with Dove bar soap, rinse them thoroughly, wet my comb and smooth my tangled hair. I also wanted to speak like him too. He was usually proper, but once in a while a choice word or two would escape from his mouth.

Apparently when I was 4, I dropped my comb and let out a phrase that had my grandmother’s ears ringing; my grandpa probably received a scolding later too. “Son of a b****, I dropped my damn comb,” my tiny little girl voice exclaimed. Let’s just say Grandma was not pleased. I was told to go sit on the davenport and think about what I had done. I just said I was copying Grandpa.