Sarah Nigbor

If there was one thing that I could change about myself, it would be to have a thicker skin. Over the years, I have been told that I’m “too sensitive,” “take things too seriously,” or “need to lighten up.” While I agree to a point, I can’t say that I fully agree. Those comments have usually been said by someone angry or annoyed with me who knows me well; don’t they realize I already struggle with this? Maybe they don’t, but I do.

I have spent countless hours trying to figure out why I am the way I am. I think we all do that. I loved psychology class in high school (thank you, Mr. Stumpf at RFHS) and took a course in college. Even as a kid, I remember being extremely embarrassed if I did anything wrong or got into trouble. I hated failing at anything and berated myself if I didn’t do well. I had a loving and supportive family; I was harder on myself than they ever were. I just never wanted to disappoint them.

I often wonder if it’s because my dad died when I was so young. I don’t remember him because I was 2 when it happened. I often wondered why the other kids had a dad and I didn’t. My little brain thought maybe I had done something wrong, to make him leave. Of course that wasn’t true, but part of me thought that if I did really well at everything, maybe people would be proud of me and no one would ever leave again. My heart breaks for that little girl who kept all those big feelings inside.

Since age allegedly brings wisdom, I’ve learned to be kinder to myself over the years. That doesn’t mean I don’t still strive to do the best I can at everything I do. But I’m better at realizing that I’m a human being and all humans make mistakes. I’ve also learned that my worth is not tied to my accomplishments, but to my character. Nothing makes me happier than bringing a smile to someone else’s face.

Curiosity led me to take a personality test on Psychology Today’s website. I wanted to see if I know myself as well as I think I do. It seemed pretty spot on. It said:

“You are quiet, practical, compassionate, and friendly. You hold yourself to high standards and carry a strong sense of duty and tradition. You create safety by noticing and carrying what others need. It’s how you are wired.

“Duty overrides your body's signals. People are counting on you, so you push through tired, then exhausted, then running on empty. Stress finally gets your attention only when your body forces a stop. That's not you ignoring yourself.”

It went on to say that I’m an introvert that can be social when needed but that I need to recharge alone and decompress before being around others again. It’s so true. I love being by myself and relish quiet.

I truly like it when our readers reach out to me with story ideas and feedback. While the shy kid in me feels embarrassed if a mistake is brought to my attention, I remind myself that I am human. Admitting our mistakes is a sign of character and growth. When I make a mistake, I will print a correction.

The shy introvert in me also recoils when people criticize our efforts. Everyone has a right to their opinions, and this is where that thicker skin would come in handy. Mr. Jim Reichert wrote a letter to the editor this week telling us to do better with our reporting, saying readers deserve better. The kid in me wanted a hole to open and swallow me whole. But he’s right. We haven’t reported on the drought occurring in our area this summer. It is a big deal. So instead of falling into a hole, I plan to take his suggestion. It is a great story idea and we could all learn from it. If the drought has affected you this year, please reach out to me at sarah@piercecountyjournal.news I would especially like to hear from people in agriculture.

I would also like to encourage readers to reach out with story ideas. We might not see or hear about everything, so your help is appreciated. We also have a small staff (me and Andrew to cover the whole county), but we will try our best to continue covering important local news.