There is always room for levity. This certainly rings true in the sometimes over the top zealousness and seriousness associated with big time college and professional sports. Hopefully the following will bring a few smiles, snickers, and chuckles to readers.

From former Major Leaguer John Lowenstein of the Baltimore Orioles. “They should move first base back five feet because there are so many close plays over there.”

From NBA player Antoine Walker when asked why he shoots so many threes. “Because there are no fours.”

From New Mexico State Basketball Coach Weldon Drew. “We have a great bunch of outside shooters. Unfortunately, all our games are played indoors.”

From former professional tennis player Vitas Geruliatas after losing to rival Jimmy Connors 16 consecutive times. “And let that be a lesson to you all. Nobody beats Vitas Gerulaitis 17 times in a row.”

From former Major League catcher and baseball broadcaster Tim McCarver. “Bob Gibson is the luckiest pitcher I ever saw. He always pitches when the other team doesn't score any runs.”

From former Major League outfielder Dick Allen when asked about playing on grass or artificial turf. “ If a horse won't eat it, I don't want to play on it.”

From longtime conservative columnist George Will. “All I remember about my wedding day in 1967 is that the Cubs lost a doubleheader.”

From Hall of Famer Hank Aaron. “It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course.”

From Orlando Magic General Manager Pat Williams. “We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play.”

From NBA Basketball Player Chuck Nevitt. “My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt.”

From former Major League Jim Bouton. “Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field?”

From former NCAA Basketball Coach George Raveling. “When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team.”

From former USC Football Coach John McKay. “We didn’t tackle well today but we made up for it by not blocking.”

Former Professional Boxer Rocky Graziano. 'I quit school in the sixth grade because of pneumonia. Not because I had it, but because I couldn't spell it.'

Former NFL Wide Receiver Terrell Owens. “Don't say I don't get along with my teammates. I just don't get along with some of the guys on the team.”