From the editor's desk: Outnumbered by teens/tweens

By Sarah Nigbor
Posted 3/23/23

The day I’ve been dreading since giving birth to my precious daughter is already here: She knows everything and I am the dumbest, uncoolest human being on the planet.

That might be an …

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From the editor's desk: Outnumbered by teens/tweens

Posted

The day I’ve been dreading since giving birth to my precious daughter is already here: She knows everything and I am the dumbest, uncoolest human being on the planet.

That might be an exaggeration, but it’s beginning. She is 10 years old (11 in July), so I thought I had one or two years left of being worshipped and idolized. Wrong. Literally overnight, teen tendencies are coming out, giving me a glimpse of the next few years. My crystal ball is showing me gray hair and bags under my eyes, more than I already have. Lord help me.

She has the teen hair toss down pat, the eye roll, and the sigh of exasperation when I say something she deems silly. She went from begging to have a sleepover every night in Mommy’s room to talking to her friends on the phone for hours about who Snapchatted who and who said what at lunch. Stuffed animals and Barbies are getting traded for nail polish and worrying about “the trends.” Instead of running to my car after school, she slowly saunters down the sidewalk with her friends, chattering a mile a minute.

I found a container of coffee grounds in the shower. Why, you ask. I wanted to know too. “Duh Mommy, coffee grounds make your hair shinier. I saw it on YouTube.” Well, I am sorry I am so not with the times, dear daughter. Personally, rubbing coffee grounds into my scalp sounds about as fun as trying to get sand out of my hair. But whatever works. At least it’s not gum.

I still see glimpses of the sweet, adorable child who loves stuffies, crafts and baking. But now this child literally shot up overnight and is about an inch taller than me. It’s weird to be eye level with your fifth grader (her dad is very tall). She wears shoes larger than mine and I’m getting her hand-me-down shoes, not the other way around.

Yesterday she was fighting so much with her brothers, who are 12 and 13, also fun ages, that I forced them to stand in the middle of the living room for five minutes hugging each other. You would have thought I’d asked them to walk naked on broken glass shards in front of their classmates. The longer they fought it and the longer they said rude things to each other, the longer the hugs lasted. It was hilarious. I even documented the milestone on camera. The only way to be let loose from the affection torture chamber was to utter five sincere, detailed compliments to each other. The hug lasted a lot longer than five minutes! I had to referee and keep the exercise from turning into a wrestling match, but it worked. They were kind to each other the rest of the day.

I know that kids grow up. I knew this day would come. I thought people were exaggerating when they said time goes by fast. They were not. I know there are great, wonderful times ahead. But I am going to miss having little kids who are enchanted by things, who love to go with me on work assignments, who don’t pull away from a hug if their friends are around. With four tweens/teens in the house, don’t be surprised if I seem a bit haggard.

Sarah Nigbor, From the editor's desk, column, opinion